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I hadn't planned it, but I got the full 24 hours
out of this birthday, awake before midnight due to jetlag and I couldn't
force myself back to sleep. Riding through and past the farm fields of my
ancestry in the morning haze, the smell triggered memories older than me.
You're supposed to freak out when you turn 40 but I took it as just another
mile marker on a road that was rolling before I was born and will continue
long after I exit. 40 laps around the sun equals roughly 23,336,000,000 miles
just to end up in more or less the same place. 14,610 days. There aren't
many I remember distinctly. I guess that's OK. Today was aimless. I bought
two bottled beers, rode the train to Prague and met Honza and Zuzana at
Namestí Míru, then helped Honza get his wheelchair-bound friend
Marcel and
his stuff cross-town. I thought doing something selfless was good symbolism
for the start of a new decade but I'm probably still selfish as ever though
I long to be of service. I got on a random tram and rode it to wherever,
then got off and walked,
nowhere to go and
all day
to get there. I meandered back to familiar territory and
surprised Thea, a fellow American, at her office. We met in Prague 15
years ago almost to the day; I left, she stayed. We went for coffee then
I accompanied her to daycare where we sat in a playground and watched her
daughter play among 30 or so other tykes. It did not stir my dormant paternal
instinct. Let it sleep. Then I walked alone up to
Letna beer
garden and met up with Honza, Zuzana, and Marcel. We sat in the grass
and I picked up
cigarette
butts in a radius around me, a small circle of clean. I didn't do some
things I'd planned and did do some I hadn't. That about sums up the first
40. |