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Nothing like waking at noon hungover
to firm one's resolve. It occured to me that
the best way to do POD
consistently is to do it first thing, even if
that means squinting hungover through rainy
day noon glare. I have no one to blame but
myself, James Kirchmer, and the free well
drinks at last night's Stranger
Christmas party, which despite the tone of
sodomite secularism was not without its
miracles. F'rinstance, my vodka tonic slipped
off the flusher but landed upright in the
urinal, without spilling and I didn't get any
piss in it. Heartened, I went back into the
fray where an anonymous Polaroider took my
picture after I lit her cigarette. The flame
you see is the same which lit her fire. After
giving a stranger a hickey because he asked
for one (and I wasn't the first to
platonically suck his bruised neck), a group
of naughty boys camped by the bathroom laid
the King of Dees on me--although not strictly
found I add it proudly to my collection. Things
got silly when the only thing which irritated
management more than my smoking a prescription
cigarette was when I thoughtlessly snubbed it
on the table (she told me to put it
out!). She screamed for a bouncer, threw my
smoke to the floor (horrors!), and handed me
to the barback who commandeered my fresh drink
(horrors!) and passed me to the doorman who
gently (we'd hit it off when I came in)
escorted me to the sidewalk. All ended well,
however, when the carny freak in drag who'd
taught me how to stiltwalk at Burning
Man's Camp Suckee Fuckee this year came
around the corner with my snubbed cigarette.
We lit it, laughed, and James finally made it
out after dutifully finishing both my drink
and his.
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