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July 6, 2004

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woke up to the sound of rain.
7:20 a.m.  it sounded great.
wrote a check for seattle electric
going back to may. $60.30. sifted
through the mail i picked up on my
last visit down, tidied my cabin, swept.
yesterday i unpacked my old cross-country
hitchhiking tent from way back when cuz
i wanted to bikecamp at obstruction pass.
it smelled pretty bad so i threw it in
the washer. bad idea. it came out covered
in green tatters that looked like lint,
but on closer inspection were revealed
to be waterproof coating come apart.
i draped it on a picnic table to dry in the sun,
carefully removed that which still hung on,
rolled it into a little petrochemical ball.
"this is all i am doing right now," i thought.
i left tent out overnight to dry, which is why
the rain came on so strong. that's ok.
once, i left a shirt to dry on the line.
it rained then, too. for several days.
i left it out. the sun came back, it dried.
best smelling shirt i ever washed. could
be detergent is a lie. i stopped drinking
a few days ago. now i just sit and stare
out the window. i'm slowly unfolding hesse's
steppenwolf, read a part about him going
to bed alone in his room and it struck me
as sad, then i noticed that i was reading it
alone in bed. then it didn't seem so bad.
herman wrote: "eternity is a mere moment,
just long enough to tell a joke." as i write,
this day isn't over yet. the sun comes out,
leaves, sand, rocks, and wood slowly dry.
a springfed creek trickles out into a
rapidly receding tide.